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Overheard in the Office

As most of you know, working in an office can be an excruciating exercise in human comedy. People say some dumb stuff—and some really funny stuff—when they’re knee-deep in work and the most nonsensical statements make complete sense at the time. These are just a few I’ve heard over the past month or so …

“You know, after riding this Segway, walking feels so pedestrian.”

“We just signed our first mental health hospital customer. Isn’t that crazy?”

“We should hire people based on how well they play Bejeweled. In fact, we should start a fantasy Bejeweled league.”

“You know what word should exist? ‘Brawesome.’ Its like brilliant and awesome at the same time. Like the fact that I just made up that word is totally brawesome.”

“I’d rather shit vomit.”

“So what’s the opposite of brawesome?”
“Blawful. Bloody awful.”

”’Maximum ROI’ is a funny term. It should be the name of a sandwich. It could be a power bagel with peanut butter and Jolly Ranchers.”

“Why don’t we hire that freelancer? He’s really good.”
“If we hired him he wouldn’t do any work anymore.”

Comments.

Natalie
wrote the following on Thursday April 27, 2006

"Why don't we hire that freelancer? He's really good."
"If we hired him he wouldn't do any work anymore."

My favorite. :)

The Co-Worker
wrote the following on Friday April 28, 2006

I can testify…these are things people ACTUALLY said. And how could you forget the classic, “What’s the end of quarter?”

Sugar
wrote the following on Friday April 28, 2006

Lol, fun quotes, all of them. Thanks for sharing.

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This is not spam
Remember
wrote the following on Thursday August 21, 2008

Metadata.

  • Posted: Thursday April 27, 2006
  • Category: Random Life
  • Comments: 3

Synopsis

Sometimes working in an office can be a surreal experience in human drama. People say the darndest things when they think no one’s writing it down.

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